Signature Upon Receipt Please

MCHN's (my curly-haired niece's) biological father is still stalling.

Haven't heard a word from him since April 9th, when he said he'd call me later that evening to "work something out."  Despite my weekly, and sometimes even daily, attempts to reach him via phone since then, I've yet to speak to him again.

In the meantime, MCHN had a birthday last week.  She's officially a two-year-old now (and she hasn't stopped singing happy birthday or asking for birthday cake since!  Seriously!!) 

And no, her BF (biological father) did not call to wish her a happy birthday or to ask how she is.

Although it's easy to get caught up in the day-to-day normality of MCHN living with us, the truth is that our home is not a permanent home for her...not yet anyway.  It's been 5 months since she's lived with either of her biological parents.  I'm not sure why her BF is dragging his feet...it's a horribly hard decision, I understand.  But, EITHER BE A SINGLE FATHER OR PLACE MCHN FOR ADOPTION ALREADY!! 

I decided if he wasn't going to answer my phone calls, a letter might do the trick.

After much thought and prayer, I finished a letter urging  BF to make a move to give MCHN a permanent home. I told him specifically that "we can no longer provide MCHN with a temporary home."  Do you know how hard it was to say that??  I mean seriously...if she left our home at this point, I would be heartbroken and so worried about MCHN.  Anyway, I explained in the letter that we love this special little girl and that we would love for her to join our family permanently.  However, if he chooses to raise her as a single father, my husband and I will respect and support his decision.  The goal here...the most important thing...is that MCHN needs permanency NOW!  I threw a date out there...May 14th.  I explained our attorney has advised us that if we have not heard from him by this date, and he has not disclosed his intentions for MCHN, my husband and I would then have two options: 

• place MCHN in State custody (foster care) or
• begin litigation to allow the court to decide if BF is fit to be a parent.  (Note:  if the State finds you an "unfit" parent, this ruling stays with you FOR LIFE.  That means should BF somewhere down the road, get married and have children, the State could meet him at the hospital upon the child's birth and remove the child from his care.  This is SERIOUS!!!) 

 

I ended the letter as such:

 

"Please understand - our wish is for MCHN to have a permanent home with all the love, safety and security this special little girl deserves.  Our goal is to help her achieve a permanent home AS SOON AS POSSIBLE."

It was liberating putting this letter into the mail, a scheduled delivery date to BF on Monday afternoon.

However, I didn't prepare myself for what happened next ...

Tuesday morning, I woke, anxious to check the U.S. Postal Service website to see the status of my envelope.  Had BF received it?? 

I was completely discouraged Tuesday evening after learning that the mail carrier's attempt to deliver my letter to MCHN's BF on Monday afternoon was unsuccessful.  The ExpressMail envelope, which included my letter as well as a Consent for Adoption form and a postage-paid ExpressMail return envelope, required a signature upon receipt.  Evidently no one was home to accept the envelope...or no one cared to come to the door.  Either way, my hope was squashed like a grape.

I spent yesterday evening praying and asking God what in the world he wants me to do for this little girl.  I felt at a loss.  I knew I had to give it to Him.

 

This morning I learned that the envelope was re-delivered yesterday at lunch time.  Signature upon receipt was obtained.    

 

HOORAY!!

 

 

 



(In case you're wondering, this is a "jumping" hooray! Some SERIOUS excitement!!)



 

Now that I know BF has my letter in his hands, I'm praying, praying, praying for God to do His wonderful work and for me to be strong (and patient!) and willing to take the next step, whatever that may be.